We’re back!

Posted: March 18, 2014 in Breaking News

Hello once again, Bloody Feeders!

You may have noticed that we have been unable to post for the last few days.  Unfortunately, we had a massive security breach that potentially put all of us at TheBloodyFeed in danger.  As you may recall, we had a note anonymously delivered to our offices by one of the killers last week.  This, of course, was of great concern to us given that we’ve taken heavy precautions to keep our location a secret.  It was discovered that we had a mole working with us who was secretly feeding information on our activities back to persons unknown.

Rest assured, this person has been terminated, and is currently being questioned by several different multi-letter government agencies in order to put an end to the killings that have been happening recently.  For legal reasons, we cannot release any details on this person’s identity until after the investigations have completed.

We have since moved to a new location, and have done a complete security overhaul to make sure that similar breaches don’t happen in the future.  Unfortunately, this was a very time consuming process as you can probably imagine, so we have been unable to update our site with the latest pieces of news.  However, we are confident that all of our user submissions have remained anonymous, so don’t fear!  Just in case, we have been working with the FBI to make sure that no harm will come to anybody linked with us.

Over the last few days, there has been a lot of activity that has gone unreported, including the murders of four of the remaining killers in the previously-reported murder tournament: Briana Ohel, Jamie Lyn, Emily Wilson, and Ivan Washington are no longer stalking the streets at night.

Going forward, we will continue our reporting on all of the criminal activity taking place in our city.  We must remain vigilant, even in the face of overwhelming danger, if we are to be able to sleep soundly at night again.  Thank you all for your continued support.


This just in, Bloody Feeders:

Ivan "Ike the Berg" Washington

He’s so cool, even his death picture looks awesome.

Yet another of the members of the previously reported murder club has been gunned down today.  Ivan “Ike the Berg” Washington was shot while trying to pick up his son who is enrolled in a local elementary school here in Las Vegas.  Though no bystanders were harmed in this attack, it poses serious security concerns for the school in question, and will likely result in years of therapy for Washington’s son.

One of the teachers at the school, Roseanna Dupree, had this to say:

[Washington’s son] is a recent transfer to my class.  He’s always been a great student – good grades, pays attention in class.  Nothing out of the ordinary.  I had no idea that his father was such a dangerous person, or that he had people trying to kill him.  It’s come as a great shock!  I do recall, however, that [Washington] seemed very jumpy at the last parent-teacher conference, always looking over his shoulder, like he was afraid of people coming into the classroom.  He even asked at one point to move the conference to a windowless room instead!

Though he was a cautious person by nature, it appears that Washington was still caught unaware, and ended up paying the ultimate price for it.

Police are still on the scene questioning witnesses.  Once new information becomes available, we will keep you all updated.

This just in, Bloody Feeders:

Emily Wilson and Jamie Lyn

This is the memorial image posted to Wilson’s Facebook page by her friends.

We’ve had TWO murders this evening.  It appears that Jamie Lyn and Emily Wilson had formed some sort of alliance, and were out visiting Stoney’s for a little rest and relaxation.  Unfortunately, it appears that they were both tracked down and shot dead by one or more members of the assassin group they were both members of.   We found this image posted to Wilson’s Facebook page by her friends to commemorate her last evening alive.

Sources on the scene report that Wilson and Lyn were drinking and dancing for most of the evening, but that things turned deadly just after 9 PM.  A masked gunman entered the club and cornered Lyn while Wilson was buying the next round.  With nowhere to run, Lyn screamed for Wilson to get out as quickly as possible, but it was too late.  Her assassin brazenly gunned her down in front of dozens of onlookers, then rushed out the front door.

When Wilson heard the gunshots, she tried fleeing the scene as quickly as possible, but she, too, was eventually run down and shot multiple times.  Police on the scene are currently taking witness statements and reviewing security footage for some clues as to the identity of these women’s killers.  One witness had this to say:

So I was dancing with [Lyn] for a little bit, and was hoping that I could get her number and maybe see her some.  I thought things were going great, but she kept saying these weird things, like that she was a wanted woman or something.  I didn’t think much of it, ’cause she was already pretty drunk.  But then when those thugs burst in and started shootin’ the place up, well… it started to make a lot of sense.

It seems that whoever is killing these people loves to boast, as we’ve received photos of both victims in the moments leading up to their demise.  We must caution you, viewers, these images are somewhat graphic:

Jamie "Compass Rose" Lyn

Lyn enjoying her evening just moments before being gunned down by her masked killer.

Emily "Nom de Plume" Wilson

Wilson, trying to flee her masked killer.

Murder the Fourth

Posted: March 14, 2014 in Briana Ohel, Murder

This just in, Bloody Feeders:

Briana "fyrsjel" Ohel

The moment right before the shootout occurred.

We have received word that Briana “fyrsjel” Ohel has been gunned down.  Police on the scene report a massive amount of carnage – multiple victims were injured during a broad-daylight battle between two killers in the previously-reported murder tournament.  It seems that Ohel had acquired a job as a registered nurse at a fertility clinic here in town.  Due to the fact that the scene is currently under police investigation, we are unable to post the address.

It’s interesting to note her profession was one that helped to bring life into the world, considering how many she’s taken over the years.  It seems an odd, but fitting choice.  One of Ohel’s co-workers, Joyce Melendez, had this to say:

[Ohel] was always so sweet, but there was something… off about her.  Like I would see her in the break room sometimes during lunch, and she just was staring off into space.  Not, like, a normal stare, either.  My husband, rest his soul, was in the Vietnam war, and he had that same look.  Like he’d seen things that would haunt him for the rest of his life.  I don’t know what Bree’s past was like, but she definitely had her demons.  I just never imagined that something like this would happen…

During the course of the 15-minute-long battle, Ohel used her special psychic powers to set fires to cars and bystanders alike, causing severe third-degree burns to those unlucky few who were caught in the cross-fire.  Our reporter on the scene was able to interview one of the people injured in the fight:

I was taking my wife in for our scheduled appointment, and realized that I’d forgotten some medical reports in the car.  When I went outside, I saw someone wearing a balaclava start opening fire with some kind of weird, futuristic-looking weapon at one of the nurses.  I ducked for cover behind my car, and all of a sudden, started feeling hot all over, like I was in an oven.  That’s when my shirt caught fire.  I couldn’t see nothin… all I could hear was gunshots and people screaming.  It went on for what seemed like forever, and all I could think of was whether [my wife] was ok.

When police arrived on the scene, the killer had already fled, leaving behind several people with massive burns and gunshot wounds.We are continuing to investigate, and will keep you all updated as new details unfold.

This just in, Bloody Feeders:

Brean "Magilla Da Killa" Thompson

The murderer posing after gunning Thompson down in broad daylight.

Earlier today, we received a report that an unidentified woman was shot down in broad daylight while out walking with her young son.  While we were investigating this tragedy, a note was anonymously delivered to our offices containing the picture on this post.  It appears that the unidentified woman was, in fact, Brean “Magilla Da Killa” Thompson.  It seems that she was yet another target in the disgusting murder tournament described in previous articles.  Unfortunately, this death is not without wider consequences, as Thompson’s son, Miles, will now require foster care.

We were able to contact one of the members of Thompson’s gang, Jae’Kwon “Skinhead” Jones, for comment:

Magilla was like a mother to us, man.  I don’t know what we’re going to do.  Maybe move back to Georgia… but not before we get those motherfuckers who did this!  I swear to God, we’re going to make those bastards pay!

With Thompson’s death, that leaves 13 psychopaths still loose on our streets.  While the violence seems to be contained at this point to just the members of this syndicate, there is no guarantee of the safety of bystanders.  Police are currently running forensic samples on the note to see if they can track down Thompson’s mysterious killer.  We will keep you updated as more details unfold.

This just in, Bloody Feeders:

Break "Magilla Da Killa" Thompson

This photo was taken by her second-in-command after they had just savagely beaten an elderly Wal-Mart greeter.

We’ve just gone through a treasure trove of data on Brean “Magilla Da Killa” Thompson, and are ready to present you with part 5 of our Killer Bio series.  Thompson’s parents were both practitioners of the highly controversial Church of Euthanasia, whose primary focus is the idea that the earth would be better off without people.  With this sort of background, it’s no wonder that Thompson was imbued with a pure hatred for her fellow Man from a young age.

Thompson murdered her first victim at the tender age of 16 at an Olive Garden.  Enraged by the very presence of a family with 7 children at the table across from her, she flew into a vicious attack against James Robertson (43), ultimately choking him to death by means of a spaghetti noodle she had shoved into his mouth.  His family could only watch helplessly as she slowly suffocated the life out of him.  Police unfortunately arrived just a little too late to save Robertson, but they were able to apprehend Thompson with little issue.  At her trial, her parents’ pleas of religious intolerance fell on deaf ears, and she was sentenced as an adult to 15 years at Georgia’s Arrandale State Prison.

When she was released on good behavior after only 10 years served, Thompson moved to Las Vegas, where she hit the streets and immediately set to work building her criminal contacts.  She founded a gang called LV4D (Las Vegas 4-Deep), consisting of herself, Chucky “Tallboy” Tailor, Matt “The Greek” Koumopolous, and Jae’Kwon “Skinhead” Jones.  Their primary modus operandi was to cause chaos, and in droves.  Taking cues from Charles Manson, whose gang famously used psychological scare tactics to ensure compliance with his rulings, LV4D began a campaign of trapping and vandalizing pets belonging to people they were trying to shake down for protection money

In order to strike fear into the hearts of business owners and nursing home residents up and down the Strip, Thompson and her gang would break into their victim’s house late at night, stealing their cat or dog.  Precisely 4 days later, the pet would be returned, but with the moniker “LV4D” spray painted onto its side.  This plan proved to be quite successful, according to our sources; with the flood of protection money coming in, Thompson’s gang was able to move into the big leagues.

Driving around town in newly-acquired luxury vehicles, blasting the latest in Indie Rock, the LV4D gang started picking out targets for armed robberies and smash and grab jobs.  Their most famous heist was more or less a homage to the movie “Ocean’s 11“.  Though she didn’t have 11 people at her disposal, Thompson’s gang managed to bring the Bellagio to its knees with a daring daylight raid, pocketing anywhere from 80 to 100 million dollars in unmarked bills.

While Thompson doesn’t have nearly the body count to her name that some of the other depraved killers on our list can boast, she is most certainly dangerous.  There have been many unresolved murders that, at least in this reporter’s opinion, could potentially be traced back to her gang’s activity.  It seems highly suspicious to us that 20 of last year’s 115 homicides were people who had been targeted by Thompson’s gang in the course of their protection schemes.

If there is some kind of killer tournament afoot, I would not want to square off against this psychopath.  You can rest assured that we are working tirelessly to provide you with any and all information as it becomes available.

Killer Bio: Shawn Green

Posted: March 12, 2014 in Biographies, Shawn Green

This just in, Bloody Feeders:

Shawn "Ragaboo McFancyPants" Green

He has perfected the art of making people discount the seriousness he represents.

As promised, we are back with part 4 of our “Killer Bio” series.  Today’s article focuses on the late Shawn “Ragaboo McFancyPants” Green.  Green is an interesting case: for most of his life, you could consider him to be fairly normal, if a little bumbling.  He grew up a US Air Force brat on a base in Germany.  Like most military kids, the constant moves left him always feeling a little out of place.  This sort of transience awoke in him the desire to make a name for himself – to stand on a solid foundation.  While trying to find himself, he tried on a plethora of different personae, including that of a rap MC he called “Shawny G“.  His song, “I’ll Die When I’m Famous” speaks volumes about his aforementioned drive.

Eventually, however, Green found his way into G2, the Irish National Intelligence Agency.  Our sources say this transpired when Green, hammered off of a single pint of Guinness, started loudly boasting in a Belfast bar that he “could be the best spy there ever was!”.  Some of his drinking companions that evening decided to take him up on this boast in a very tongue-in-cheek way: Green was drafted into service in their “leathcheann” squad to serve as a sort of court jester.  Though they were decidedly insincere in their offer, Green took to the training program with relish.  He soon learned all of the various and sundry uses for water pistols and NERF weaponry, under the false assumption that they were precursors to learning about actual combat with real weapons.  When he finally asked his superiors when his real training would begin, however, their laughter showed him the folly of his beliefs.

Enraged at his unjust treatment, Green quit in a huff; he took to the internet, and located a document called “The Anarchist’s Cookbook“.  With the plethora of subversive information contained therein, he modified what few harmless toys he could grab on his way out, and turned them all deadly.  The water pistols he loaded with a highly corrosive acid that didn’t react to the plastic, and the foam weaponry he turned into projectile explosives.  He formed garrotes out of shoe strings, and fire-hardened his wooden swords.  Armed to the teeth in now-lethal armaments, Green went back to the pub where he first met the intelligence agents.  He bided his time until they were drunk enough to not see straight (which, considering their heritage, took quite a while), then when they were finally in a stupor, he struck.  The carnage was horrific.  One bystander had this to say:

He was like an animal!  He stabbed one bloke in the bollocks, then chewed his ear straight off!  While the others tried to grab him from behind, he shot one of those foam darts at the bar, and everything exploded in a shower of glass.  He then pounced on the other three of them and started hacking at them with this wooden sword.  It was feckin’ brutal!  Even when eyeballs started popping out, he didn’t stop.  Eventually, everybody was down, then that gobshite pulls out a wee squirt gun and shoots acid in their faces!  I never seen the like before!

Green fled the establishment, then went into hiding.  Over the course of the next three months, a dozen similar fatalities were reported amongst the ranks of the agency.  Their disdain for him proved to be their downfall – nobody wanted to take seriously the threat that a man with plastic weaponry presented.  After completing his revenge, Green vanished, and went completely off the radar until he showed up at the gathering last Friday.

Feeders: I hope that we can all learn from G2’s failure in this.  Green may have chosen unorthodox methods, but he was every bit as lethal as the other killers currently plaguing our city.  Don’t let your guard down, even for a second, or you may share his gruesome fate.